Well, Hello World – Let’s Try Again

Well, goodness – I created this Blog in the Fall of 2012 – I must be the queen of procrastination and the non-writer of all non-writers. What I DO do is to help writers market themselves.  Usually somewhere along the line someone who has been the recipient of a number of email exchanges, will tell me I should write.  And I smilingly say thank you – and then, just don’t.  While somewhat adept at the give and take of repartee and succinct telling of whatever the tale, advice at hand should be, when it comes to my own ‘stuff,’ I seem to be helpless and hopeless.  My brain can make up lovely daydreams – it’s just that when faced with putting them – or thoughts in general – on paper (when will this phrase change to ‘on the digital screen I wonder – I prefer on paper though, I have to say), I freeze – wonder to myself if all the ‘really good thoughts’ haven’t already been shared – think my puny little mind meanderings wouldn’t really count for much in the grand scheme of things when there are so many others, good and bad, mind you, who will tell you they just ‘love to write’.  Hmmm – for me it’s like exercising – I know I’m going to feel better after I do it – or at least START doing it – at first, it’s (for me, that is) going to be a bit agonizing.  So, why do I worry about starting to write at all if I feel like this?  It’s crazy.  But it’s also because of, not only all those outer voices, but that inner one.  Oh, I didn’t mention that one, did I?  Yeah – she’s like a neglected child – which is a sin because I have been a wonderful mother in my life so far – to four fantastic children.  It’s this child though who, although she knows I really do love her after all, has been content to sit silently, and manage to subsist on whatever crumbs have fallen from the table over the years.  Oh, it’ s not that I have mistreated her shamefully.  She has had a good home – no bars on the windows – people have, as I mentioned earlier, treated her more than kindly.  I guess I have managed to dress her up well enough as we have progressed through the work and social worlds I’ve lived in.  It’s just that when no one else is around and it’s just her and me, that I know she feels neglected and lost – somewhere in time and space.  I have begun to think of trying to reach out to her and make things better between us while the rest of our intertwined lives take place, but struggle, just as I do when it comes time to put on the work out clothes, with making that first move – and then the next – and the next after that – and so on. I have thought that opening the door has to occur first.  That makes sense, doesn’t it? I think I need to do that to SEE just where she is in the somewhat cobwebbed, lonely place where she currently resides so that I can know how to better lead her to a better place.  Ok, I think this has all been nothing more than my hand on the knob … is that a start?

Cookie on tablet 2

About ingmarie4

I write about new authors, books, and my take on life in general. American/Norwegian, 4 kids, 1 greatly beloved granddaughter, single, love dancing, laughing, conversations that lead to deeper understanding and definitely laughter. Oh yeah, my nickname is Cookie. Sending out good karma is key!
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